self-fulfillment

a friend of mine just tweet, "tell me one good reason why we should need men?". she's 33 and still single. she's a really fun and joyful person. she's pretty and nice and why she hasn't been married til now is a mystery for me. she's not picky and from what i see she always have a boyfriend but maybe there are many reasons why her relationship never succeed into marriage.

despite her cynicism in her tweet, i actually like (or maybe the exact word is, admire) her attitude. although she has a boyfriend, but she's the kind of the girl who can be happy even if he doesn't have one. she can be happy by herself. 

i admire that. i think the term "you complete me" popularized by tom cruise in jerry maguire is wrong. it seems like we're empty before we found someone. it may sound romantic when you're fall in love that the presence of your "other half" completes you, that they the center of your universe. but when they gone, your world would shatter apart. if you make someone your everything, when they're gone, you lost your everything, not just your "someone". and you know that nothing lasts forever right?

i think we should be happy by ourselves first before we meet someone who would make us even more happier. they just add another happiness to our life. it's called self-fulfillment. if we're already happy before we met them, we would stay happy after they're gone (a little sadness and tears for a while is humane, of course). 

just my two cents. and this is somehow ironic because when i first met my current boyfriend right now, i was in sadness and deeply hurt from my previous relationship. we were just friends and i didn't want another relationship, but slowly he cures my broken heart and we fell for each other. so yeah i don't practice my own preach that i should be happy by myself before i meet my soul mate, but what can i do? maybe it's just the twist of fate. and i hope everything will be just fine between us :)